I've loved and lost many animals in life but this time my love was deeper than I had ever experienced before. Furry loves are all special and loved beyond measure there is no question about that. But this time my love ran deeper than even I realized probably because we battled so many ups and downs together and spent so much time in each other's love.
So how do you say goodbye to your furry love? How do you wake up each morning and not see their precious face, feel their precious fur and hug their precious body again and again? I'm not going to lie to you. You go through life for awhile wandering aimlessly thinking it’s a bad dream, it's not real. You wake up crying, you go to bed crying, you cry until you think you can't cry anymore and then you cry some more. The house feels so empty with their physical presence gone. You feel empty and alone. You want to hug everyone you meet because you have no furry love to hug anymore. You look at all the places they used to lay and they're not there anymore and it makes you sad, really, really sad.
And then you hear people tell you to get another furry love. But you don’t want another furry love, you just want your own furry love back. I remember being on the floor trying to revive my furry love and saying "give her back, give her back to me". They were the most devastating moments of my life. She stopped breathing right in front of me and there was nothing that I could do to save her to bring her back. I tried but she was gone. Only minutes before I snuggled with her and we exchanged silent moments together staring into each others eyes. Her precious eyes I have glanced in a hundred times before now lifeless.
Day by day the quietness mounts. I used to play the radio for her everyday so she never felt alone when I couldn't take her with me. And now when I leave I still turn on the radio and it reminds me of her. And day by day I remember all the precious memories we had together. The way she looked at me every morning to say what took you so long to wake up, I've been waiting quietly to snuggle with you. You cherish all the memories you had together. You find all the pictures you ever took and wish you had taken more. You go for a drive and miss having her with you. You talk all the people that were special to both you and her and hear all of the wonderful things they say about her. And then you sit alone and wonder why she had to go, could you have done something more to keep your furry love longer, did you miss something, did you fail your furry love, did God need your precious furry love more than you, who could love her more than you? You have one million and one questions but none of them will bring her back.
You start to fill in all the time you spent together with other things so you are not alone missing her. We used to walk at least twice a day and go outside after meals to keep her system moving. But now I can't walk on the same routes without her. I just can't bear it. Her memory still fresh in my mind as I just want to hug her again yet knowing it's not going to be.
Grieving Is Normal
It's normal to miss your furry love, It's natural to grieve the loss of the love of your life, your best friend, your confident. It is the greatest honor I know to have loved a furry love and had that furry love in turn love you right back wholeheartedly, unconditionally, pawsitively.
And then you read all the comments that other people post about missing their furry love too. You feel such heartache for them for their loss. You realize you are not alone and no one really has the answer to how to deal with the loss of your most precious love. People talk about it all taking time. And time goes on and you still feel the same.
When The Bond is Broken
The thing is that there is no time ticking away from you. A love so precious never dies, that love simply waits for you on the other side, right there beside you. Furry love never leaves you. That love is only physically gone, not mentally, not spiritually. The bond of the physical body and their spirit simply breaks apart and they move on spiritually so they are free to go with you wherever you go.
Furry Love Lives On Forever
They are still in your mind and your heart. After my dog passed on, I found a butterfly one morning in one of the favorite spots she used to lay, it fluttered, I fed it and spend most of the day and then when it was time, it flew away to let me know she is ok. Spirit has a way to letting you know your precious furry love lives on. And after that I started finding white feathers symbolizing a rebirth. And while you will still cry, the tears will cleanse away more of the hurt to clear more room for the memories to come back to you, the happy times you spent together. As devastated as you are, not having had such a furry love would be even more devastating.
As you share your loss with others you hear that someone has accepted another furry love in their life to find out later that the new animal was actually born the same day their furry love died. How the family picked another animal purposely different than their furry love as it was too painful only to have the new animal grow up to look identical to their furry love. To stories about new animals doing the same habits as the previous animals. Is it coincidence or fate? You decide. I choose furry love.
Fate Will Find You Again
So how do you say goodbye to a furry love? You never do. They are always right there beside you, they guide you in life. Watch for them. They send you signs through nature, butterflies and feathers, thoughts and memories, music and dreams. Be open to the possibilities. A furry love lives on forever.
And when the time is right you will find each other again when your furry love bonds with another furry body that enters your life and you fall pawsitively in love all over again. And that's what furry soulmates do. They follow you in life wherever you go and love you forever. They find you over and over again and love you deeper and deeper yet again and again. And yes, you will still find yourself crying over the loss of your furry love even when you least expect it. For a love like that is wrapped around your heart and soul and never ends. Goodbyes are not for furry loves, instead it is til we meet again my furry love.
Big hugs to all,
Maria Lisa Polegatto
August 26, 2016
("Whiskey", my furry love, in the pictures below, was just over 14 years old)